Babies
On October 9, 2009, Mason and Charlotte were brought into the world. It’s been quite the experience since then. Some things have been great, some have not. As usual, I have a bit of a different perspective on things than what I hear from most.
First off, Mason and Charlotte are awesome. I can’t begin to put into words how much emotion pours out of me when I get to hold them. I held judgement on whether I would like them or not. After 17 days, I can say I genuinely love them.
Mostly …
So, the one thing that still feels like a rattlesnake biting my cheek; is the sound of babies crying. I don’t know how to describe the agony of hearing them cry, but after 17 days, I can say it’s not much better when they’re your own.
That gets me to everyone else:
The one thing I notice about most folks who interact with the kids, is that crying is only a minor inconvenience to them. I hear people saying how cute it is, while baby-talking to the screaming baby. When I mention how much the sound of them crying bothers me, I’m usually treated like an oddity. It’s like folks think I’m gonna get over it.
Imagine if I were to pinch you in the nipple with pliers, while telling you: “It’s fine. Why are you so upset”.
Other than the crying, the lack of sleep that entails having twins is especially brutal. I’m a big dude, so sleep isn’t something to joke about for me. I’ve lost 40 lbs since last July. At this rate, I’m going to be the size of my kids by next year.
Don’t get me wrong: I love my kids. When they’re happy, nothing feels better than to hold them and hang out with them. Every now and then, I have to hold one of them on my pillow with me to sleep. You just can’t imagine what it’s like to wake up with your daughter’s forehead on yours.
I guess the point of all of this, is that for most guys, babies are mostly hell. The screaming and the lack of sleep make you completely crazy. I walk down the street these days waiting for someone to look at me the wrong way. I could use the chance to let out some built up frustration on someone wearing a popped collar.
:/
Category: personal | Tags: babies, charlotte, discussion, mason, reality 3 comments »
November 3rd, 2009 at 3:00 am
Congrats on the kids.
You’re not alone on the crying thing. But it changes. For better and worse. Soon you will begin to hear something more to the crying. I thought some of that Oprah wackiness about the language of crying was hoo-hoo bs. But there is something to it. When they need certain things there is a tone, a timbre to it that is more about where the need is coming from than any language skills but it becomes a signal for you to do something. It actually becomes calming. At first you just don’t know what to do to shut the kid up. Heightened by lack of sleep and a dread that you are screwing something up it is crazy at times. But as you begin to hear what they are crying about then you can deal fast and the ability to do something that works is really a great feeling.
But then the little bastards figure out how to manipulate the cry. They do it early too. Way earlier than I thought possible. My wife nailed it and would make fun of me when I got played.
Good luck. I do admit, I am still annoyed when I hear someone else’s kid cranked up. Tolerance is reserved for my own kind.
November 5th, 2009 at 2:03 pm
Tim,
Thanks for the encouragement dude. It’s definitely been pretty hard lately. Today is our first day without any Grandmas to help out. So far so good though …
November 5th, 2009 at 3:49 pm
You and Melissa will learn far more from these children than you will ever teach them. I learned so much about God from looking into my baby’s eyes. Hearing him laugh was worth more than anything money could buy. And look how he turned out